CW 42: Looking Back

"Time flies over us, but leaves its shadow behind." - Nathaniel Hawthorne

Disclaimer: Late Night Entry (meaning there might be more grammar mistakes than usual) 

As predicted in last week's weekly obsession, as soon as uni kicks off, I will be nothing but stressed, which is pretty much on point. So I guess props to my one week younger self for predicting that. But aside from being stressed, I spent a lot of time in my hometown this week, close to my old school and old habits, which made me think a lot about how much time has passed since I last went to school and how much has happened in the meanwhile.

Friends and family from the old times will probably recognize the building in the header immediately. Others will probably question the architect's ability to choose matching colors, but this was the place I met a lot of amazing people, learnt a lot of useful and not so useful stuff, complained about everyone and everything and went to school. And it's funny how my time in school is still stuck with me even though it's been a good 4,5 years since my last day of school. I was never a person who disliked school. I always appreciated that I could see my friends every day, get to go on trips and see the world (well Europe mostly, concentrated on Austria, but you get the point) and actually learn some things. Yes, maybe you don't need every single fact you hear about in school, but in the end it helps you to build a grid of knowledge which makes it easier to learn new things, because you can connect the new stuff to things you already know. Not everyone sees school that way, which I often didn't understand. I was an obnoxious person during school - which I only know now, after looking back and watching old videos, photos and messages. - and it makes me want to apologize to every single person I ever talked to during that time (I'm sorry!). I never really had any struggles to keep up with the classes or anything so for me school was an entertaining morning/afternoon and when I got home, I'd go and enjoy my free time, so it was really just a fun time. 

I often look back on my time in school. On the times I cheated on tests - well it wasn't cheating, I'd like to say it's just comparing and weighing out whether my solution is more plausible or the person whose sheet accidently caught my attention. On the times I didn't have to attend class, because I was engaged it extracurricular activities - and those were a lot, because wherever I saw an opportunity to have a day or two off of class I'd just partake in. On the times we flew to other countries and the times we got to know teachers from a different side, which might sound odd, but the teachers at my school were rather young comparing to the average and they were (usually) super chill.

This week I watched some old videos from a handball game, where again I didn't have to attend class, and was just thinking about where everyone from that team is right now. The only thing we had in common was handball, so when I stopped playing we all kind of lost touch and went our own ways. It's funny how things change. People change. You change. And you don't realize it in the moment, only later when you look back, you're like "Was that really me?" "Did we really thought that was funny?" "Did we really make such a big deal out of that?" And I love looking back at such things, because it shows how much I've grown and it makes me appreciate everything I have and am. 

...when things get messy and stressful I wish I could just go back to a simpler time like that and enjoy it for little bit more